Whose Line Is It Anyway? Harry Potter Style!
by Zandramas
Summary: The title says it all, I believe! PG for suggestive content (we all know how that goes on Whose Line!!).
1. Weird Newscasters

Title: Whose Line Is It Anyway? Harry Potter Style! Author: Zandramas Summary: The title says it all, I believe! PG for suggestive content (we all know how that goes on Whose Line!!).  
  
Chapter 1: Weird Newscasters  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything!!! The wonderfully brilliant J.K. Rowling owns the characters; ABC owns the show; and jedi-hobbit owns the idea (go read that fic when you're finished mine; I laughed my ass off!!!!!!!).  
  
A/N: By the way, Ron Weasley is the host. As if you couldn't tell by the first line.:-)  
  
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Ron: Good evening, everybody, and welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway? Harry Potter Style! One tonight's show: I found him in a cupboard . . . Harry Potter!  
  
*Harry grins widely at the camera*  
  
Ron: This one I picked up sitting on a leprechaun . . . Seamus Finnegan!  
  
*Seamus gives a toothy, Lockhart-like grin*  
  
Ron: I discovered her under a book . . . Hermione Granger!  
  
*Hermione is smiling prettily and twinkling her fingers at the camera*  
  
Ron: And this guy turned up in detention . . . Lee Jordan!  
  
*Lee does the stupid car salesman/TV-game-show-host wink-and-smile combination*  
  
Ron: And I'm your host, Ron Weasley. Come on down; let's have some fun! *Ron runs down to his desk from a seat next to a pretty girl in the audience* Hey, welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway? Harry Potter Style, the show where everything's made up and the points don't matter. That's right, the points are just like Slytherin's Quidditch team!  
  
*The audience groans and some laugh*  
  
Ron: Oh, what??? It's not like any of them are here!  
  
*Audience laughs*  
  
Ron: Heh . . . Anyway, let's get the show started! Our first game tonight is . . . Weird Newscasters! This is for all four of you. Lee, you're the news anchor. Hermione, you're Lee's ditzy girlfriend that expects to be proposed to on your date. Harry, you're doing the sports, and you think . . . hahaha . . . you're bored with life one second and then furiously angry with everyone the next.  
  
*Harry looks at Ron incredulously and runs over to his desk, where he grabs the notecard where this is written and looks at it. He shakes his head and sits back down*  
  
Ron: See? And you thought I was lying . . . Hahahahaha. And last but not least, Seamus, you are doing the weather and you are a zookeeper frantically trying to sedate a killer monkey.  
  
Seamus: What???  
  
Ron: That's what it says. *shrugs*  
  
*Harry, Lee, Seamus, and Hermione get into their places*  
  
Ron: Lee, whenever you hear the music, go ahead and start.  
  
*Newscast music plays*  
  
Lee: Hello. I'm Lee K. Fawcett and welcome to the six fifty-seven news. Hogwarts headmaster Albus Dumbledore is deluged with mail as rumours abound, saying that he wears no clothes under those long robes of his. When asked, Dumbledore declined comment, pulled his robe tighter around him, and shuffled off slowly and carefully, so his robe wouldn't open.  
  
*Audience laughs*  
  
Lee: And now to my lovely co-anchor, Hermione Reallyreallysmartgirl. Hermione?  
  
Hermione: *smiles like an airhead and twirls a lock of hair around her finger* Um, like, hi, Lee. *giggles* Um, I'm having a really great time tonight. Uh, like, you know, being here . . . with you . . . on TV . . . for sure . . .  
  
Lee: Um, Hermione? You're supposed to be giving the news, not talking to me.  
  
Hermione: Huh?  
  
Lee: I can't talk to you like this. Tell the viewers at home the news.  
  
Hermione: *getting more and more anxious and starts hyperventilating* What do you mean, you can't talk to me like this? I thought you loved me! I thought we were going to be together forever!  
  
Lee: Shh, we'll talk later. And-  
  
Hermione: *getting very distraught and starts shrieking* What do you mean, we'll talk later???? No, we're going to talk-  
  
Lee: *taps Hermione on the head with his hand* Sleep.  
  
*Hermione's head drops to her chest*  
  
Lee: And now, after that very stimulating report, let's take it over to sports with Harry Stick. Harry?  
  
Harry: *in a bored voice* Thank you, Lee. In sports news, the Gryffindor Quidditch team won . . . again. The Slytherin Quidditch team lost to Gryffindor . . . again. And no one really cares about Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff, so-  
  
*Harry stops mid-sentence, looks enraged, and storms out to a random member of the audience *  
  
Harry: ARE YOU LAUGHING AT ME?!?!?!?! ARE YOU . . . LAUGHING . . . AT ME?!?!?!  
  
*Audience Member looks scared and tries to say no, but is laughing too hard*  
  
Harry: WHY ARE YOU LAU- *bored voice* Never mind, I don't care.  
  
*Walks back up to his place on stage*  
  
Harry: *In a bored voice* Back to you, Lee.  
  
Lee: Erm . . . right. Thank you for that . . . uh . . . highly educative report, Harry.  
  
Harry: *in a bored voice* Yeah . . . Whatever . . .  
  
*Hermione bursts out sobbing and screaming incomprehensibly*  
  
Lee: Okay! Now, over to the weather with . . . I can't remember his name . . . The Weather Guy!  
  
Seamus: Thank you, Lee. Now, as you can see here *gestures at imaginary weather chart* We have a few cold fronts coming in-no, get back *Pokes imaginary animal away with imaginary pointer* with a warm-I said get back. Please get back! *Pokes imaginary animal multiple times and then sighs* Thank you. Good Bozo. Good carnivorous, man-eating killer monkey-how did I end up by myself? *Falls to the ground, pretending to fight off an imaginary animal* AHHHHHH!!!! NOOOOOO!!! *Pretends to throw off animal, only to have it leap right back onto him again* Back-to-you-Lee!  
  
Lee: Yes, thank you, The Weather Guy. Well, that's all the time we have for today. Stay tuned for "When Killer Monkeys Attack".  
  
*Newscaster music plays and then dies down*  
  
*All the performers return to their seats*  
  
Ron: Hey, that was great. Uhh . . . a thousand and eight points to you all.  
  
*Performers looked impressed*  
  
Harry: Wow. Do you want something?  
  
Ron: Hahahahaha. Okay, for our next game . . .  
  
A/N: So??? What do you guys think? Any requests for future games??? Drop me a line! 


	2. Scenes From A Hat

Chapter 2: Scenes From A Hat  
  
A/N: This chapter is dedicated to my friend Ravyn Nyte and my first reviewer with a request, Hogwarts Graduate. Thanks for helping me, you guys!  
  
And thanks to Hogwarts Graduate (thanks again for your help!), Stealthy Slytherin (haha, I love getting reviews like yours!! I'm glad you like me putting Seamus in there; I figured he'd be good, what with all the sexual innuendos of the show. I've always thought of him as a sort of sex- orientated person! lol), and Sparrklez (thanks for your review! Glad you liked the first chapter! Hopefully, you'll like this one as well!).  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Ron: Okay, for our next game, you guys are gonna play Scenes From A Hat! Scenes From A Hat. This is for all four of you.  
  
*Performers get up and head to their places; Harry and Lee on one side of the stage, next to Ron, and Hermione and Seamus on the other*  
  
Ron: For this game, we asked the audience to write down suggestions and then we put the good ones - the good ones, there were bad ones - into this hat *lifts up and shakes an emerald green top hat*. Every so often, I'm going to pick out a suggestion for these guys to act out. Okay, let's get the game started.  
  
*Audience cheers*  
  
Ron: *picks piece of paper from the hat* "Sounds that annoy the hell out of you"  
  
Seamus: *steps onto the stage* *pretends to pull a piece of paper from an imaginary hat* Sounds that annoy the hell out of you.  
  
*Ron hits the buzzer to signal the end of Seamus's turn*  
  
*Seamus looks directly at Ron before heading back to his place while the audience laughs and Ron looks indignant*  
  
Lee: *walks over to Ron's desk and hits the buzzer repeatedly before stepping back next to Harry*  
  
*Ron hits the buzzer to signal the end of Lee's turn*  
  
Ron: Okay, that's enough with that one. Uhhh, *pulls piece of paper out of the hat* "Top secret meetings of the Ministry of Magic"  
  
Harry: *steps out onto stage and gestures for everyone else to join him* *starts talking quietly in a conspiratorial voice* Okay, so we're going to order a large half-pepperoni, half-Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans pizza and a medium cheese pizza, right?  
  
*Audience laughs as Ron hits the buzzer and everyone goes back to their places*  
  
Ron: Hahaha. I can see Fudge saying that. Okay, *pulls piece of paper from a hat* "Readings from" - aw, crap *audience laughs* - "Readings from Ron Weasley's secret diary".  
  
*Audience laughs hysterically as the four performers get evil looks on their faces*  
  
Hermione: *grinning* We're gonna have fun with this one.  
  
Ron: *waves them on* Yeah, yeah. Let's get it over with.  
  
Hermione: *steps out onto stage* *pretends to pull a book from a shelf* "Dear Diary, I know she's one of my best friends, but I think Hermione is so pretty!"  
  
*Ron, blushing bright red, hits the buzzer as Hermione goes back to her place and the audience laughs*  
  
Harry: *steps out onto stage* *pretends to pull a book from a shelf* "Dear Diary, I know that he's one of my best friends, but I think Harry is so pretty!"  
  
*Ron turns beet red as he lies on the buzzer while Harry grins and goes back to his place and the audience howls with laughter*  
  
Lee: *steps out onto stage* *pretends to pull a book from a shelf* Dear Diary, today, my dad gave me 'The Talk'. I laughed and said, 'Dad, I already know all about that!' "  
  
*Ron couldn't possibly get any redder as he his the buzzer repeatedly, Lee bounces, grinning, back to his place, and the audience laughs hysterically*  
  
Seamus: *grinning evilly, he steps out onto the stage* *pretends to pull a book from a shelf* D-  
  
*As soon as Seamus opened his mouth, Ron hits the buzzer*  
  
Seamus: But I had a really good one!  
  
*Ron shakes his head and hits the buzzer repeatedly*  
  
Seamus: Aw, damn!  
  
*Seamus heads back to his place*  
  
Ron: Okay, next scene. *pulls piece of paper from hat* Oh, this one's gonna be scary. "What Snape does in his free time".  
  
*Audience laughs*  
  
Lee: *steps out onto stage* *pretends to pose in a compromising situation* Okay, go ahead, Malfoy, take the picture.  
  
*Audience howls with laughter and Ron almost falls out of his chair laughing. Grinning and laughing, Harry reaches over and hits the buzzer for Ron. Ee heads back to his spot*  
  
Seamus: *steps out onto stage* Boys, I'm telling you, Dumbledore has assigned all the heads of houses to watch the fifth-year boys shower!  
  
*Ron starts laughing all over again, as does the audience as Seamus heads back to his spot. Harry reaches over again and hits the buzzer*  
  
Ron: *still laughing* Okay, I think we've heard enough for me to have nightmares for the rest of my life about that subject.  
  
*Audience laughs*  
  
Ron: *wipes tears from his eyes* "Okay, go ahead, Malfoy, take the picture." *Audience laughs* "Boys, I'm telling you!" Hahahahahahahahaha. Oh, boy. Okay, *pulls piece of paper from hat* "Books you would be horrified to see on a bookstore shelf". This ought to be interesting.  
  
Lee: *steps out onto stage* *pretends to pull a book from a shelf* "Severus Snape's Photographic Portfolio". What the hell?!?!  
  
*Audience laughs as, looking disgusted, Lee pretends to shove the book back onto the shelf and storm away. Ron buzzes*  
  
Harry: *steps out onto stage* *pretends to pull a book from a shelf* "Ronald Weasley's Diary". Augh! *Pretends to drop book onto the floor*  
  
Ron: *buzzes as audience laughs* Very funny. Okay, let's see . . . how about twenty-six Weight Watchers points for Hermione and three for Harry, Seamus, and Lee.  
  
*Harry, Seamus, and Lee look indignant*  
  
Lee: Hey!  
  
Seamus: What's up with that?  
  
Ron: For the diary thing, Seamus and Lee, and for the book thing, Harry.  
  
*The three performers think and then concede that it's fair as the audience laughs*  
  
Ron: Hahaha. Okay, our next game is . . .  
  
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A/N: Tell me what you think! Any requests for future games or performers or anything, give me review or send me an email: Bger_Girl731@yahoo.com or TwitchyFerret11403@yahoo.com. Later folks!!! 


	3. Let's Make A Date

Chapter 3: Let's Make A Date  
  
A/N: *squeals* Oh, my gosh, you guys are waaaaay too nice to me!!! Your reviews are sooo nice! I love getting reviews like you guys'!!!  
  
To alecatq: I'm so glad you liked the fic so far! I hope you'll like this chapter as well. Thanks so much for you're suggestions! I think I'm going to use those games in future chapters. And thanks for reviewing to my wizardsonline story!  
  
To Hufflepuff_Chic: Thanks for your review! Glad you like it! And thanks for your suggestion!  
  
To CrazySwimmer27: Thanks so much for your suggestion. Did you get my email? And Hermione will be in this chapter a lot. Trust me.  
  
To Sparrklez: You're still reading! Yay! Thanks for your game suggestion.  
  
To Lenai Riddle: I'm glad you like my fic! I think I'm going to use your suggestion in a future chapter. Look out for a little note!  
  
To koolcatt: Glad you like the fic and thanks for your suggestion! I'm doing the Irish Drinking Song as the next game, I've already got it written out. I just have to type it up.  
  
Anyway, this chapter is dedicated to alecatq, Sparrklez, koolcatt, and Hufflepuff_Chic for suggesting the game. Read closely, you four! Enjoy!!!  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Ron: Okay, our next game is called 'Let's Make A Date'. In this game, Hermione will be playing a bachelorette on a dating game. She has to pick between Harry, Lee, and Seamus - hahaha, good luck - who all have odd quirks. At the end of the game, when I buzz, she has to guess what those quirks are from the answers she's given to her questions.  
  
*Hermione, Lee, Seamus, and Harry all get their stools and set them up*  
  
Ron: Go ahead, Hermione, whenever you're ready.  
  
*Hermione sits primly on her stool, pretending to put on about a pound of lipstick before placing the invisible tube away*  
  
Hermione: *talking in a really girly, Beverly Hills sort of voice (A/N: No offense to the Beverly Hills people out there!)* Okay, um, Bachelor #1: I like to go on moonlight strolls during the school year with older, hunky Quidditch players. What do you like to do to break the rules during the school year?  
  
*Lee is sitting on his stool with a scowl on his face*  
  
Lee: *growls* I never break the rules. You Gryffindors, especially that Potter, always think the rules are below you. Well, here's what I say to that: 100 points off Gryffindor!  
  
Hermione: *talking in a really girly, Beverly Hills sort of voice* Yeah, you don't sound like much fun. *Audience laughs* Um, Bachelor #2: My fantasy date would be a long, romantic candle-lit dinner and then a walk on the beach. If we were to go on your fantasy date, where would we go and what would we do?  
  
Harry: Well, firs' we'd go an' have a cuppa down at The Three Broomsticks. Then, we'd go inter the Fores' an' then I'd show yeh some really interestin' animals - oh! Like this one. 'e's got the head of - ouch, stop tha'. Anyway, 'e's got the head of a horse - I said, stop tha'! And 'e's got the tors - ahh!! Aahhh!!!  
  
*Harry pretends to have been attacked by a large animal while the audience laughs*  
  
Hermione: *talking in a really girly, Beverly Hills sort of voice* Right, okay, I'll leave you to . . . do whatever it is you're doing. *Audience laughs* Okay, Bachelor #3: I like to read, do homework, and suck up to teachers in my free time. What do you like to do in your time off?  
  
*Seamus sits on his stool unceremoniously*  
  
Seamus: Well, I'd 'ave to say that - hey! *Pretends that he's getting captured and handcuffed from behind* Excuse me for a moment. *Pretends to break out of his handcuffs and runs out to the audience* Hello, there. *Grabs four random audience members and pulls them to their feet* Now, what are your names?  
  
Random Person #1: *laughing hard* Um, alecatq.  
  
Seamus: And a lovely name it is!  
  
Random Person #2: *also laughing* Sparrklez.  
  
Seamus: And you do sparkle.  
  
*Sparrklez laughs harder*  
  
Random Person #3: I'm koolcatt.  
  
Seamus: You do seem very cool, indeed.  
  
Random Person #4: *giggling hysterically* Hufflepuff_Chic.  
  
Seamus: You are very chic, I can tell that here. Now, come with me. *Seamus pulls alecatq, Sparrklez, koolcatt, and Hufflepuff_Chic up to the stage*  
  
Hermione: *talking in a really girly, Beverly Hills sort of voice* Uh, Bachelor #3, are you going to answer my qu-?  
  
Seamus: Stop asking me questions or I'm afraid these three will get it!  
  
*alecatq looks indignant and slaps Seamus's cheek lightly before walking back to the audience among laughter from the rest of the audience*  
  
Seamus: *rubbing cheek* I'm not so sure I deserved that.  
  
*Looking offended, Sparrklez and Hufflepuff_Chic both slap Seamus on the cheek as well before heading back to their seats as the among fresh screams of laughter from the audience*  
  
Seamus: *still rubbing his cheek* I might have deserved that. *Sits back on his stool*  
  
*koolcatt looks affronted and also slaps Seamus on the cheek before heading back to the audience among howls on laughter. Ron is nearly falling out of his chair, pointing and laughing at Seamus*  
  
Seamus: *rubbing his cheek* I might have deserved that one, too.  
  
Hermione: *talking in a really girly, Beverly Hills sort of voice* Well, you certainly are an exciting person. Um, Bachelor #1: What would you do to surprise me on our one-month anniversary?  
  
Lee: *sourly* I would brew you up a poison and tell you it was a special wine. Then I'd laugh and watch you and all the other Gryffindors lose at Quidditch.  
  
Hermione: *Laughs and talking in her normal voice* I think I know who you are. *Resumes talking in the girly, Beverly Hills sort of voice* Um, Bachelor #2: What's your dream wedding?  
  
Harry: *still fighting off the imaginary animal and suddenly lies as though either comatose or dead on the floor*  
  
Hermione: *talking in a really girly, Beverly Hills sort of voice* Right, well, you seem sort of . . . well, dead. So - *audience laughs* - so, Bachelor #3, same question: What's your dream wedding?  
  
Seamus: *very excitedly and happily and a bit drunkenly* A wedding! I love wedding! Drinks all around! *Swings his arms wildly and almost falls over*  
  
Hermione: *talking in a really girly, Beverly Hills sort of voice* Right. Okay. Thank you Bachelor #3.  
  
*Ron hits the buzzer*  
  
Ron: Okay, Hermione, who are they?  
  
Hermione: *laughs* Um, I think that Bachelor #1 is . . . Professor Snape, maybe?  
  
Ron: Yes!  
  
Lee: *astonished* How did you know?  
  
Hermione: Hahaha. Um, Bachelor #2 is someone getting eaten by a wild animal?  
  
Ron: Uhhh . . . who's getting eaten?  
  
Hermione: *having no idea* Uhm . . .  
  
Harry: *pretends to be petting a little animal* Good baby Norbert.  
  
Hermione: Hagrid!  
  
Ron: Yep! And Bachelor #3?  
  
Hermione: Bachelor #3 is a criminal getting arrested and then breaking loose?  
  
Ron: Nooo . . . What kind of a criminal is he?  
  
Seamus: You're forgetting one thing, mate. I'm Captain . . . *implies that there's a name that comes after "Captain"*  
  
Hermione: Ahhh . . . Of course; how could I have not gotten it immediately? But I haven't said who he is yet because I'm dragging it out for the suspense! *Audience laughs* Haha, um, Bachelor #3 is . . . Captain Jack Sparrow? From Pirates of the Caribbean?  
  
Ron: Yeah! Good job.  
  
Hermione: That was a really good movie. I mean, how could it not be? It had both Orlando Bloom AND Johnny Depp in it. *Nods energetically while Ron, Harry, Seamus, and Lee roll their eyes and the girls in the audience cheer and clap*  
  
Ron: Yeah, yeah, go sit back down.  
  
*Performers go back to their seats after putting their stools next to Ron while the audience cheers*  
  
Ron: Uh, great job, all of you. I'm going to give you all 20 points.  
  
Seamus: That's it?  
  
Ron: *shrugs* I'm running a little low. More should be here soon. But I'm giving alecatq, Sparrklez, koolcatt, and Hufflepuff_Chic each a hundred points for slapping Seamus. *Turns to them in the audience and gives them two thumbs up* Good job, you guys.  
  
*Audience laughs*  
  
Seamus: *wryly* Thanks, Ron.  
  
Ron: Ehhh, what can you do? Okay, our next game is . . .  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
A/N: So what did you guys think? By the way, I've decided I'm going to start a new thing. See, like, when you guys request things that have the need for people in the audience to shout out suggestions for things, I would put your name there instead of "Random Audience Member" or whatever. Get it? Hope you review! More reviews equal chapters sooner!!!  
  
Has anyone seen Pirates of the Caribbean? Oh, my gosh, that was such a good movie!!!!! Really funny, very exciting, incredibly Orlando Bloom and Johnny Depp (Hehehe lol), wicked good. If you haven't seen it, go. Now. Don't even bother to turn off your computer or do anything. Just leave and go buy a ticket to the movie!  
  
I'm not going to be able to update for a few days. I'm going to a dance camp for the rest of the week and I'm going to be totally exhausted at the end of each day (it's 8 am every day until 4 with an hour for lunch around noon, except on Friday, where it ends at 11:30). The earliest I'm going to be able to update would probably be Friday night or Saturday. Please be patient and soooooo sorry for the wait!!! 


	4. Irish Drinking Song

Chapter 4: Irish Drinking Song  
  
A/N: Ohhhhh, Aye-dee-di-dee-di - 'kay, I'll stop now. I got reviews!! I love you all!!!!  
  
To Mrs.Wood-Mrs.Lupin: I'm so glad you like the story! I was planning on trying to do that audience sound effects game in a future chapter. Right now, I'm trying to figure out how I'd write that. And by the way, does anyone know what that game's called? The one where Drew pulls two audience members up to the stage and they do the sound effects for Colin and Ryan as the act out a scene? I can't remember. I'm having a bit of a senior moment!  
  
To Olean-Radcliffe: I'm so glad you like the story! I hope you'll like this chapter as much as the others!  
  
To El loco uno: *takes cookies and hoards them in bedroom* Hehehe, wasn't Pirates of the Caribbean good????? 'Course, it had to be. Orlando Bloom and Johnny Depp were in it! I'm definitely doing another episode, at least one more, I think. More than one if you guys want me to. And I'll definitely put those two in!!! They would be soooooo funny on a comedy show!  
  
To harryschic: I'm so glad you like the fic! I've already got the hoedown all written up. It's coming in the next few chapters, so keep your eye out for it!!!  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Ron: All right, you guys, grab your mugs. It's Irish Drinking Song time!  
  
*Audience cheers as the four performers grin and take their places in a line: Lee, Harry, Hermione, and Seamus*  
  
Ron: Okay, from this section behind me, give me a subject for our song.  
  
Random Person #1: Snape's hair!  
  
Random Person #2: Hogwarts professors and their classes!  
  
Ron: Yeah, that's a good one. Okay. Let's hear the 'Hogwarts Professors And Their Classes' Irish Drinking Song!  
  
*Irish Drinking Song music starts up and the performers do that hand holding-mug-thing they do*  
  
All: Ohhhhh, Aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di  
  
Lee: I was in Transfiguration today  
  
Harry: McGonagall was strict  
  
Hermione: Normally she's firm but fair  
  
Seamus: But acting, that's her shtick  
  
Lee: She taught us how to levitate  
  
Harry: We like to lift things up  
  
Hermione: Ron wasn't saying the spell right  
  
Seamus: And we messed this verse up!  
  
All: Ohhhhh, Aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di  
  
Harry: I had Charms class yesterday  
  
Hermione: Flitwick's really short  
  
Seamus: You have to wonder of he was teased as a kid  
  
Lee: Because he's . . . really short  
  
Harry: *laughing* He taught us to say 'Accio!'  
  
Hermione: That means to summon things  
  
Seamus: I kept getting hit in the head  
  
Lee: *pointing* Hermione had a fling!  
  
*Hermione bursts out laughing and can barely say the "aye-dee-di-dee"s*  
  
All: Ohhhhh, Aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di  
  
Hermione: Potions class really sucks  
  
Seamus: Snape's a mean old git  
  
Lee: Whenever he starts talking  
  
Harry: I tune out the whole bit  
  
Hermione: He gives lots of detentions  
  
Seamus: To only Gryffindors  
  
Lee: Snape really hates us all  
  
Harry: *puts up both middle fingers* [bleep] you, Snape  
  
*Audience screams with laughter and the other three performers laugh hysterically so they can just hardly get the "aye-dee-di-dee"s heard*  
  
All: Ohhhhh, Aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di  
  
Seamus: Divination's horrible  
  
Lee: Trelawney is a nutter  
  
Harry: She spreads her stupid lies around  
  
Hermione: Just like butter!  
  
Seamus: The only class I really like  
  
Lee: Is D-A-T-D-A  
  
Harry: I didn't really like it last year  
  
Hermione: But Harry taught the D.A.!  
  
All: Ohhh, Aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di  
  
Ohhh, aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-deeee-diiii-deeee-diiiiii!  
  
*Audience laughs and sheers as performers give deep bows and head back to their seats. Ron is crying, he's laughing so hard*  
  
Ron: Oh, go - hahahahahahaha. "[bleep] you, Snape!" Oh, that was great!  
  
*Harry grins and gives Ron two thumbs up as Ron wipes his eyes dry*  
  
Ron: Okay, that was fantastic. Uhhh, I think I'm going to give you all . . . five hundred points.  
  
*Performers look triumphant. Seamus pretends that he's hoarding something away*  
  
Ron: Yeah, I'm feeling pretty generous today. All right, the next game these guys will be playing is . . .  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
A/N: So, what'd you guys think? Did this chapter quench your Irish Drinking Song thirsts??? JK. So, any requests for future chapters? Requests for quests or games or future performers?????? Let me know and I'll try to accommodate your suggestions!!! 


	5. Hoedown!

Chapter 5: Hoedown  
  
A/N: This chapter is dedicated to Wayne Brad, Drew Carey, Colin Mochrie, and Ryan Stiles for creating one of the funniest hoedowns I've ever heard in my life - and trust me, I've heard a lot. And also to Drew Carey for a really funny line that he came up with (that's at the bottom of the chapter). And thanks also to my friend Anthony for sending me the clip so I could listen to it as many times as I want! Basically, I only changed a few words in the song and that's it.but go here () for all the Whose Line lyrics you could ever ask for!!!  
  
Also, thanks . . .  
  
To Olean-Radcliffe: I'm so glad you liked this chapter! I think I'm going to do Props in an upcoming chapter, but I need help figuring out what the props should be. If you, or anyone else for that matter, have any ideas whatsoever and you're willing to give them to me, I'd totally love you!  
  
To Kristina: I thought Seamus and Jack Sparrow were sort of created from the same mold, so I figured Seamus would do okay, as the captain. And wasn't Pirates of the Caribbean a fantastic movie????? I just went and saw it Wednesday night with a bunch of my friends, and I'm going again next week to see it for the third time with another of my friends!! So much Orlando and Johnny, so little time . . .  
  
To ChocolatePudding2: Thanks for reviewing! Hope you like this chapter as much as the previous ones!!!  
  
To koolcatt: I'll put you in anytime, just GIVE ME IDEAS FOR GAMES AND PROPS AND SUGGESTIONS THAT THE AUDIENCE WOULD GIVE . . . or things along those lines . . . ;-)  
  
To JediMasterWhit: Hope you enjoy this chapter as much as the others and I hope you laugh your ass off on this one too!!!  
  
To gryffspopgurl: I've been debating on whether or not I should have him make a guest appearance, like, in Duets or Song Styles or something. What do you think???  
  
To alecatq: I really, really, really, really, really, really, really want to do Greatest Hits, so if you guys have a suggestion for an unusual occupation and also styles for the commercial pitchmen (or pitchman and woman, I haven't decided who's going to do what), than I will definitely write up Greatest Hits, before I end the episode.  
  
To lad di da di doo: I'm so glad YOU LOVE IT!!! Haha, I'm just kidding. Thanks, though, for your review!  
  
To alecatq: Hey, if you give me suggestions for games or whatever, I'll be more than happy to put you in the fic!!!! Hope you keep reading and reviewing!!!!  
  
To Moonie2: *takes 9 points and hoards them away* Thanks so much! I'm glad you like the story! *Runs away shouting, "I got nine points and you didn't!" *  
  
To Sparrklez: I'm glad you like the putting-reviewers-in-the-story-when- they-help-me-out idea! Enjoy the chappie!!  
  
To Mrs.Wood-Mrs.Lupin: I'm glad you liked the "[bleep] you, Snape!" I worked very hard on the wording. Lol. And I will definitely put Oliver and Remus in future episodes if you guys want me to continue writing this sort of fic.  
  
To Jay Jay: Thanks for reviewing, and I'm writing Party Quirks as either Chapter 8 or 9, I believe. I have all the chapters up to there planned out.  
  
To harryschic: Well, if Irish Drinking Song is your second favorite game mext to Hoedown, you should love this chapter!!!!!  
  
To Lenai Riddle: Hope you laugh your ass off on this chapter too! But don't have an aneurism; that would mean one less reviewer for me! Lol. Enjoy!  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Ron: All right! Another singing game! Yeah! Our next game is your favourite, you guys.  
  
*Performers groan*  
  
Ron: Hahahaha. That's right. Hoedown! With Angelina Johnson on keyboard!  
  
*Angelina smiles and waves as the camera pans over her. The performers reluctantly get up and form a line: Lee, Harry, Hermione and Seamus*  
  
Ron: Okay, now we need a subject for our hoedown. Uhhh . . . let's have it from this section of the audience.  
  
*Ron gestures to the section of the audience in front of the stage*  
  
Random Person #1: Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans!  
  
Random Person #2: Snape's hair!  
  
Random Person #3: Had a bad day at work!  
  
Random Person #4: You're ugly!  
  
Ron: I like that one! Okay, you guys, whenever you're ready, the 'You're Ugly' hoedown!  
  
*Hoedown music plays*  
  
Lee: Let me tell you something, happened just the other day  
  
My date was so ugly, I almost ran away  
  
She was just horrific, where can I begin?  
  
When that heifer was born her mama should've pushed her back in!  
  
*Audience laughs and claps*  
  
Harry: I met a girl in a night club, it was pretty dark  
  
Thought I'd take her home, just for a lark  
  
But when I saw her in the light, I turned and ran  
  
'Cause she looked just like Seamus Finnegan  
  
*Harry grins satisfactorily while the audience laughs hysterically and Seamus looks indignant*  
  
Hermione: I'm an ugly woman, yes it is not fair  
  
I have an ugly face, and I have no hair  
  
What can I do, that's the way the fates went  
  
The only person who'll sleep with me is the old US president  
  
*Hermione bounces up and down on the balls of her feet and smiles while the audience laughs and claps*  
  
Seamus: I am so ugly that I'll never have a lover  
  
When I leave the house, all the dogs run for cover  
  
I'm big and white and round, and if you've been listening, run, don't tarry  
  
Yes, you guessed it, my name is Potter, Harry  
  
All: Name is Potter, Harry!!!  
  
*The audience laughs and claps as the performers go back to their seats*  
  
Ron: Ahhh . . . that was great. Uh, two billion points to everybody.  
  
Lee: Yes! Forget going on 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?'! I got all the points I need right here!  
  
*Ron looks directly at the camera and wiggles his eyebrows competitively*  
  
Ron: Hear that, Regis? Two billion points!  
  
*Audience laughs*  
  
Ron: Hahahaha. Okay, our next game is.  
  
A/N: What did you guys think?? Oh, and I need two things from you. #1: I need a letter for 90 Second Alphabet; and #2: I need film, TV, and theater styles for, well, duh, Film, Television, and Theatre styles. Leave me a review you guys!!!!! 


	6. Hollywood Director

Chapter 6: Hollywood Director  
  
A/N: Ooooh, I love you all!!!! To Dana Whelks: I'm so glad you are in awe of the awesomeness! Lol. Enjoy the chapter! To Walla-Balla-Nora: I'm so glad you like the fic! Hope you'll enjoy this chapter too! To harryschic: Enjoy the chapter and thanks for reviewing the others! To digimon-lover: Oh, my gosh! You really think my fic is almost as good as jedi-hobbit's??? *squeals* I feel so honored! That's a totally great fic! And Harry totally rocks . . . Hehehe . . . To mystic-angel5: I so love you! You reviewed to every chapter when you could have just reviewed to chapter five! *gives Jaimy a huge hug* Thanks for all your suggestions! Did you see Chicago in theaters??? It comes out today! (I'm typing this on the 19, so it . . . did. I don't really know what I expected to put there . . .) To Sparrklez: Hey! Thanks for reviewing. I'm so glad you like the hoedown; when I saw it on TV, it made me laugh my ass off!!!!! To hi-lariously funny hp fan: Thanks for your review! I'm glad you like the story! I hope you'll continue reading it as I post more chapters! To Moonie2: Oh, my gosh! No offense or anything, but your review scared me a little! *takes 10 billion points and stashes them away in a secret hideaway with the other nine points Moonie2 gave her* Haha, lol. Keep reading!!! To alecatq: Thanks for your review and your suggestions! Snape's underwear drawer would be a very scary sight for these four poor performers . . . *Katie grins and looks from side to side evilly and stats scribbling on a piece of paper* . . . which is why, of course, I'm gonna use it in a future chapter! Hehehe . . . To JediMasterWhit: Glad you thought it was funny! Thanks for your suggestions and enjoy the chapter!!!!! To Noriko M. Chijinu: Thanks so much for your suggestions!! Hope you like the chapter! To BaYer04rulz: Thanks so much for your suggestion! I hope that, now you've read the first five chapters, you'll continue reading!!! Enjoy the chapter! To koolcatt: Hey! Thanks for your suggestions!! No, I haven't seen Zorro; is it good? Hope you enjoy the chapter! And keep helping me out, I need it!!!! To Infinity4: I'm definitely doing Song Titles soon. I love that game . . . Thanks for your suggestions and enjoy the chapter!! To leviathan: I wrote in the beginning of the chapter that it was dedicated to Wayne Brady, Drew Carey, Colin Mochrie, and Ryan Stiles for the hoedown. I also said that I only changed a few words in the song, indicating that I did not write it from my own ideas. I merely changed a few words so it went along with the theme of Harry, Hermione, Seamus, and Lee.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Ron: All right, the next game these guys will be playing is called Hollywood Director. This is for all four of you.  
  
*Performers get up and step onto the stage before looking at Ron*  
  
Ron: In this game, Hermione, Seamus, and Harry are going to act out a scene and Lee is going to be a big, bad Hollywood director. During the scene, Lee is going to stop it and give the actors -  
  
*Hermione clears her throat loudly and meaningfully*  
  
Ron: And actress, blah-di, blah-di, blah! *Audience laughs as Hermione walks over and hits Ron on the side of the head* That hurt!  
  
Hermione: It was supposed to!  
  
Ron: Anyway, Lee's going to give the ac - performers notes on how to do the scene. Okay, the scene is bad-girl Gryffindor, Hermione, has detention wi - hahahahaha - with evil Professor Snape, Seamus, when Snape's favorite student Malfoy, Harry, walks in. Lee, here are your director notes. Take it away, whenever you're ready.  
  
*Hermione gets down onto her hands and knees on the floor and looks up incredulously at Seamus*  
  
Hermione: Excuse me?! You want me to what?!  
  
Seamus: *standing over her, rolls his eyes* Keep dreaming, Granger. That detention will never come. All I want you to do is clean out every cauldron in the storeroom and then you need to rearrange the student cupboard. When you're done with those chores, see me and I'll find you something else to do.  
  
Hermione: Sure, Professor. Whatever.  
  
*Hermione pretends to start cleaning cauldrons. Harry jumps onto the stage, pretending to hold something*  
  
Harry: All, right, Sevvy, strip down! Time for pictures!  
  
*The audience starts laughing as Ron burst out laughing. Harry pretends to take a picture, as Seamus looks enraged*  
  
Hermione: *looking disgusted* What the hell?!  
  
Seamus: Mister Malfoy, can't you see I am conducting a detention?? With a Gryffindor??  
  
Harry: Oh, Merlin! I can't believe I didn't ask! Does she want to be in the pictures, too?  
  
*Ron falls off his chair, he's laughing so hard, much to the amusement of the audience. Hermione looks shocked and also trying not to laugh at Ron, who's having a hard time getting back up into his chair*  
  
Hermione: I most certainly do not! Especially with . . . him! *Looks sideways at Seamus in disgust* Now if it were with someone with incredible physical attraction . . . *pretends to go off in a daze thinking about good- looking people*  
  
*Seamus looks from her to Harry, who's standing holding a pretend camera and shrugging. He snaps his fingers and sweeps his hands over his face. When he brings them back down to his side, he's got a huge fake grin on his face, showing as many teeth as humanly possible*  
  
Seamus: *while keeping every tooth showing and winking like a game show host* Allow me to introduce myself! My name is Professor Gilderoy Lockhart! Order of Merlin, third class, honorary member of the Dark Force Defense League, and five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award!  
  
*Lee jumps onto the set as the audience and Ron roar with laughter*  
  
Lee: *irritably* Cut, cut, cut! That was horrible! Awful! I couldn't even bear to watch it!  
  
Hermione: *muttering along with Harry and Seamus* Well, I thought it was pretty good.  
  
Harry: Yeah, me, too.  
  
Lee: Well, you were all wrong! Now . . . wait! Inspiration is coming to me! *pulls a piece of paper form his pocket and looks at it* Muggle Nickelodeon! Do it like Spongebob Squarepants! *A long pause as all the performers stare openmouthed at Lee and Ron starts laughing* ACTION!  
  
*Lee runs off stage*  
  
Hermione jumps in to face Seamus, who's looking irritable, mean, and just all-around Snape*  
  
Hermione: I'm . . . READY!!!! *Audience laughs* Professor Snape, what are we going to be doing today? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? PROFESSOR SNAPE, ARE WE GOING TO THE KRUSTY KRAB?!?!?!?!?! *Grabs Seamus and shakes him*  
  
Seamus: *looks around, confused, in a stupid (Patrick-sounding) voice* Who's Professor Snape? I'm Patrick!  
  
*Harry steps onto the stage with a sour look on his face*  
  
Harry: *in a nasally voice* Can you two morons pipe down? I'm trying to take pictures here with my picture-taking clarinet!  
  
*Lee jumps onto the stage*  
  
Lee: No, no, no! That was all wrong! All wrong! Let me think . . . but first! You! *Points accusingly at Harry* You are so lucky I'm sleeping with you!  
  
*Harry looks ashamed*  
  
Harry: I know . . .  
  
*Hermione looks outraged*  
  
Hermione: You're sleeping with him, too?!  
  
Lee: Oh, shut up! Now, I want you to do it like . . . *pulls piece of paper from his pocket and looks at it* Ah-ha! Do it like drunken college kids! Action!  
  
*Lee walks off stage*  
  
Hermione: *sways and falls into Seamus* Dude! I know that I've got, like, a det-deten-deten-a punishment, but I am sooo drunk! Whooo!!! *Pretends to take a huge swig from a bottle before falling backwards to sit on the edge of the stage, still drinking*  
  
Seamus: *while Hermione is drinking and falling* Whooo!!!!!! Alpha Beta Kappa Frat rules, man!!! Whoooo!!!!! *lifts up his shirt, laughing like- hey what do you know-a stupid drunk frat guy. Ron and the audience are laughing hysterically*  
  
Harry: *jumps on stage, looking around him frantically before spotting an audience member and running over to them* DUDE!!!! The strippers are here!!!!!! Yeah!!!!  
  
*Harry's pumping his fists energetically as he runs back to the stage, only to trip on the edge and fall on his face while the audience laughs*  
  
Lee: *jumps on stage* Cut, cut, cut!!! *Harry and Hermione get up from the ground and Seamus stops pulling off his shirt and all three walk over to Lee* That was horrible! Pure and absolute crap! Now, I want you to do it like *pulls out a piece of paper form his pocket and glances at it quickly* members of the Real World! ACTION!  
  
*Harry, Hermione, and Seamus look at each other before ducking their heads and trying not to laugh. Harry hurries offstage and Hermione pretends to be lounging on a couch or chair or something and Seamus pretends to shoot pool*  
  
Hermione: Seamus, you don't [bleep]ing get it. When it's two-thirty in the morning and you and Harry are drunk and playing pool, I'm trying to do my detention. You don't have any consideration for anyone else in the house. We never get any sleep because you two are always up shouting and laughing. I was assigned another detention tonight because I fell asleep during tonight's detention. And do you know why? I didn't get enough sleep last night and I haven't for the past two weeks.  
  
Seamus: *lazily* Stop being such a dramatic bitch, Hermione.  
  
*Hermione pretends to look shocked. She gets up from the ground and steps to the side*  
  
Hermione: And then, he goes, 'Stop being such a dramatic bitch, Hermione.'  
  
*Hermione steps over and looks at the spot she was just in, pretending to be another roommate*  
  
Hermione: Oh, my God! I can't believe him!  
  
*Harry steps into the scene and walks right up to the camera like he's in a confessional*  
  
Harry: Seamus told me what happened and then Hermione told me what happened. Frankly, I think-and I don't mean to diss Seamus or anything-but I think Hermione was right. I thought about Seamus's and my late-night partying in the house and it's really not fair to the rest of the roommates.  
  
*Hermione comes over and pushes Harry out of the way*  
  
Hermione: *looking angry* I'm like, still heated over Seamus. He has no right to call me a dramatic bitch when he's the one pining away like some lovesick puppy over his boyfriend Ron. He's has given a new definition to 'dramatic'.  
  
*Ron hit the buzzer repeatedly, signaling the end to the game. Lee, Seamus, Harry and Hermione go back to their seats*  
  
Ron: Okay, that was great. Um, a thousand points for everyone. Two thousand for Hermione for revealing Seamus's true feelings about me.  
  
*Hermione grins innocently as the audience laughs*  
  
Seamus: *seductively* Who loves ya, baby? *winks*  
  
Ron: Hahahaha, oh yeah . . . Okay, our next game is . . .  
  
A/N: Okay, I need two more things from you guys. #1: I need a few suggestions for props; and #2: I need suggestions for a scene for Song Titles Only. Also, leave a review! I love hearing what you guys think about the fic!! It's really easy! Just hit that little button right there in the lower left-hand corner. Go ahead! You know you want to . . . 


	7. Song Titles

Chapter 7: Song Titles  
  
A/N: EEE!!! Wow, you guys are waaaaaaaaay too nice to me. Okay, thanks:  
  
To alecatq: Yeah, baby! Evil Spongebob's gonna take over the world . . . and give us all Krabby Patties. LOL. Watched waaaaay too much of that show this week . . . Are you serious about this being the last new season of WLIIA????? That's impossible!!! It can't be!!! *runs off crying cuz Whose Line's gonna end*  
  
To BaYer04rulz: Lol. Don't you hate it when they don't show the next episode?!?! I start like yelling at my TV. That just confirms my parents suspicions about me being totally crazy. ;-D  
  
To chickabiddy: I watch the show every chance I get! (Which is a lot because I'm sad and have no life!) Lol. Thanks for reviewing!!!!!!  
  
To Hufflepuff-Chicky: Haha, glad you liked that chapter! Thanks soooooo much for your ideas! I'll probably be emailing you soon for moooore help so keep an eye out!  
  
To Adrienne22: I'm soooooo happy you think the fic is hilarious!!! I have tons of fun writing it and sometimes, like at particularly funny points, I'll start laughing as I write it and my younger brothers will look at me like I'm totally mental (which, in all fairness, wouldn't be too far from the truth!!!). Hope you'll keep reading!!!  
  
To Noriko M. Chijinu: LOL! Glad you liked the chapter! Hope you'll like this one as well!!  
  
To Jess16: Lol! I liked that chapter too . . . Made me laugh while I as writing it. I'm glad you like the [bleep] you Snape and Ron's diary! And I have a feeling Snape might be possibly making a special guest entrance soon! *winks*  
  
Another A/N: This chapter is dedicated to Jess16 and mystic-angel5 because they reviewed to EVERY CHAPTER!!!!! I love you both!!!!!!!! *huggles*  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Ron: Okay, our next game is called Song Titles! This is a fun game, for all four performers.  
  
*The performers jump and go to their respective sides of the stage: Lee and Harry on one side and Hermione and Seamus on the other*  
  
Ron: In this game, I'm going to give these guys a scene and they can only speak in various song titles. So, your scene is: you are all on a secluded street in London. Take it away, whenever you're ready.  
  
*Hermione and Lee step out onto the stage*  
  
Lee: Hello?  
  
Hermione: *points in vague directions* London Calling  
  
Lee: *shakes his head, smiling and looking around* Beautiful.  
  
Hermione: *grins and tries not to laugh; looks around and grabs Lee's arm suddenly, pointing out urgently and excitedly* YMCA!  
  
*Lee tries to think of something but finally gives up and switches places with Harry, much to Ron's amusement*  
  
Harry: *takes Hermione's hand and looks her in the eye* My Heart Will Go On.  
  
*Hermione starts to laugh and looks at Harry*  
  
Hermione: Oh, forget it.  
  
*Hermione turns and walks offstage, switching places with Seamus*  
  
Seamus: *starts rubbing himself all over sensually* Dirrty . . .  
  
Harry: *looks at Seamus before pretending to rip off his shirt, points at his chest* Stripped.  
  
*Seamus tries not to laugh although Ron's loud laughter can be heard from off-camera*  
  
Seamus: *motions for Harry to come closer* Thriller.  
  
Harry: *looks disgusted* Beat It!  
  
Seamus: *looks distressed before looking seductive* I've Got A Lovely Bunch of Coconuts.  
  
*Audience roars with laughter*  
  
Harry: *waving* Hello, goodbye.  
  
Seamus: *looks desperate and gets down on his knees* *begging, almost crying* I've Been Through The Desert On A Horse With No Name.  
  
Harry: *looks around gesturing wildly as though what he's gesturing at is the most obvious thing in the world* It's Rainin' Men!  
  
*Seamus looks around helplessly as he thinks although it's kind of hard what with Ron laughing loudly in the background*  
  
Seamus: I Only Have Eyes For You!  
  
Harry: *rolls eyes and grins sheepishly* The Way You Make Me Feel . . .  
  
Seamus: Let's Make Love?  
  
Harry: *chuckles, moving towards Seamus* Get Busy!  
  
Seamus: *laughs suggestively* Hot In Herre?  
  
*Harry smiles and tries not to laugh*  
  
Harry: You . . . knock me off of my feet.  
  
Ron: *buzzes* That's a lyric.  
  
Harry: *looks, surprised, behind him at Ron* Wha - oh, [bleep].  
  
*Harry, laughing, switches places with Lee as everyone laughs*  
  
Lee: *looks at Seamus* What's Up, Pussycat?  
  
*Seamus starts to laugh*  
  
Seamus: *looks up at the ceiling, looks at Lee, points upwards* Somewhere Over The Rainbow.  
  
Lee: *flutters hands* Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.  
  
Seamus: *points up* Underneath the starlight.  
  
Ron: *buzzes* That's another lyric.  
  
Seamus: *shouting* Damn it!  
  
Ron: *buzzes again* Now I know that one's not a lyric.  
  
*Seamus makes a very lewd gesture - pick one of your own; I can think of several*  
  
Ron: Hahahahaha . . .  
  
*Hermione steps out*  
  
Hermione: *points out near Ron* Escape!  
  
Lee: *pouting and holding out his arms* Last Kiss?  
  
Hermione: *sighs and kisses Lee full on the mouth as the audience cheers, catcalls, and - you know, the general "Whooooo!!!!!!!!!!". Hermione lets go of Lee and flings her arms wide open* Man, I Feel Like A Woman!  
  
*Lee looks stunned before he shakes his head*  
  
Lee: *shaking head and walking offstage* Uh-uh. Noooooo way. Uh-uh . . .  
  
*Hermione stands on the stage looking satisfied as both Harry and Seamus stand there shaking their heads*  
  
Ron: *buzzes three times, laughing* Okay, that was great.  
  
*All four performers go back and sit down amid cheers and applause*  
  
Ron: That was really great to watch. Very funny. Uhh . . . a thousand points apiece.  
  
Lee: *pretends to hoard something away*  
  
Harry: Yess!!!!  
  
Ron: Hahahaha . . . and also a few breath mints to Lee and Hermione. Here you go, guys.  
  
*Ron holds out a box of Altoids. Hermione and Lee jump up from their seats and each grab a few*  
  
Hermione: *holds up an Altoid* Thanks.  
  
Ron: Yeah, anytime. All right, our next game is a very special game . . .  
  
A/N: Yo, everybody (or to the two or three people that read this fic . . .)!!! Okay, I need your help (again). I need a fakey, made-up language (or a real one if the fancy hits you) for Alien Translator. I also need the name of a profession (preferably something you wanted to be when you grew up) for . . . well, let's just say a special game. ;-D *winks* Thanks a bunchies!!!!!!!!! 


	8. Party Quirks

Chapter 8: Party Quirks  
  
A/N: *squeals* I love you all! You guys are waaaaay too nice to me. Anyway, here are the thanks (look for your name if you reviewed and if you didn't, shame on you):  
  
To --: Hahahaha lol. AWEEMOWUUUMBAWAY!!!!! Hahaha . . . he's such a dork . . .  
  
To Rc: I'm glad you liked the Seamus-and-Harry thing! That was actually my favorite part of this chapter. And I love Michael Jackson . . . his music anyway. I dunno what the hell he's doing in his personal life!!!!!  
  
To fire dragon child: Glad you like the story!!!!!!  
  
To Noriko M. Chijinu: Spnaglenese?!?!?! Sounds interesting . . . I love the word conbobulation!!!!! Oh, my gosh, that's so great!!!!!  
  
To Prongsy girl: I'm so happy you like the fic!!! I've never heard of Name that Fright before. Is it a game they use on Whose Line?  
  
To Sparrklez13: Enjoy the chapter!!!!!  
  
To alecatq: Thanks so much for your suggestions!!! I seriously hope they continue Whose Line. If they cut it, they're gonna be getting a few letters with some words from me!!!!!  
  
To Clarinet-Chick-'06: Glad you like the chap! I dunno where I got the idea for Hermione kissing Lee. I have a very strange mind . . . Lol. I think the game you're thinking of is called Narrate or Film Noir scene. Is it the one where Colin's looking for something and Ryan has it and there's always weird music going on in the background?!?  
  
To hieiandkuramalover: I'm so glad you like the chapter!!!  
  
To Lenai Riddle: Pussaw!!!!!! Hahaha lol. I don't think you reviewed to every chapter, only . . . hold on. *Runs and checks to see how many times Lenai reviewed* You reviewed chapter 2, 4, and 7. But you CAN review to every chapter if you want!! *wink, wink, nudge, nudge* LOL, just kidding.  
  
To JediMasterWhit: I love gibberish!!!! My friend taught me last summer when I went down to visit her and I'm teaching my friends. Trying to, anyway. It's not really going so well . . .  
  
To Helga243: Pirates of the Caribbean . . . Orlando Bloom . . . Johnny Depp . . . Pintel and Ragetti (just for laughs, I swear!!!!!). . . Nothing more needs to be said . . . *drool*  
  
To mystic-angel5: Haha, that's okay. It's happened to me more than once, trust me. I'm so glad you like my fics!!! That makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Lol. GARY RULES!!!! Hahaha LOL. O-kay, thanks sooooooo much for your suggestions I love the evil genius thing. Totally brilliant!!!! And don't even worry about writing a long review. I love getting those!!!!  
  
Another A/N: This chapter is dedicated to alecatq, Jay Jay, and Lenai Riddle! Enjoy, guys!!!!  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Ron: Okay, This is a really fun game. It's called Party Quirks. This is for all four performers.  
  
*Harry, Lee, Hermione, and Seamus all jump up and walk down to the stage. Hermione steps out onto the stage; Lee, Harry, and Seamus stand on the side of the stage next to the keyboard*  
  
Ron: All right, in this game, Hermione, you're gonna be hosting a party. Lee, Seamus, and Harry will be your guests, and each of them have a strange quirk or identity. Hermione has to guess what the quirks are. So, uh, Lee, Seamus, Harry, why don't you line up there - never mind, you already have *laughter from the audience and the performers* -  
  
Lee: *mock-slaps his hand upside his head* Duh, Ron!  
  
Ron: Yeah, I know. And, uh, I'll bring you in one at a time with the doorbell. *doorbell* And whenever you're ready, Hermione, start the party.  
  
Hermione: *pretends to set things up* Oooh, I'm so excited. My first party. And there are gonna be guys, too! *Does an excited little dance before looking at the ceiling and mouthing "Thank you!" as the audience laughs* Wonder when they're going to be here . . . *ding-dong* Never mind; they're here!  
  
*Hermione runs over to where the guys are standing in a single file line. She pretends to open up and door and let Lee in*  
  
Hermione: Hi! Great to see you!  
  
Lee: *has hands up balled up in front of his chest and as he walks, he bounces them up and down (a.k.a. a guy's way of illustrating boobs!)* Hey! Thanks for having me! *Walks over to the camera, pretending to flip his hair over his shoulder, nods towards his balled-up hands/boobs* They're fake.  
  
*Audience laughs as Lee walks/bounces over to an imaginary table to pick up a glass before quickly running to the back of the line*  
  
Hermione: Uhh, yeah, okay, enjoy the punch! *Begins to walk away, muttering to herself* Don't remember inviting him . . .  
  
*Ding-dong*  
  
Hermione: Ooh, more people! *hurries over to the "door" and pretends to open it* Hi! Come on in!  
  
*Seamus stumbles onto the stage. He stops and eyes Hermione up and down before grinning drunkenly*  
  
Seamus: *chuckling suggestively* Hey-ey, baby. How's about you and me go out and find us a room?  
  
Hermione: No, that's okay, I'm good. *Pushes Seamus away from her*  
  
*Ding-dong! Hermione hurries over to the "door" and pretends to open it*  
  
Hermione: Hi!  
  
*Harry pretends to Irish step dance onto the stage for a few moments before flinging his hands up into the air*  
  
Harry: If you people don't get this soon, I'm going to have to replace you, you arses!  
  
Hermione: Um, hello? Hi! Can I help you?  
  
*Harry looks her up and down critically*  
  
Harry: *scoffs* I doubt it. *Walks away*  
  
Hermione: That wasn't nice. *Walks over to Seamus, who is hanging all over a girl in the audience. He jumps up and throws his arms around Hermione*  
  
Seamus: *slurring* You know, baby, I think we could really, really work it out.  
  
Hermione: *laughing* I don't think so, you drunken, desperate frat guy.  
  
Ron: *buzzes* Excellent!  
  
*Ding-dong! Lee walks onto the stage*  
  
Lee: *hums "In Da Club" by 50 Cent* Yo, bi-otch, I got something to tell ya. *Motions Hermione closer* I wasn't really shot nine times. Just twice, and it was paintball.  
  
*Lee runs offstage. Ding-dong! Lee walks onstage*  
  
Lee: *walking in a hip-hoppy sort of way (DON'T ask me how that is, I have no idea!!!) and singing (not very well-half the lyrics are missing) "Jenny From The Block" by J.Lo* Hey, girl, listen. *Points to his butt* These aren't real. *whispers loudly* Implants!  
  
*The audience and Ron howl with laughter, as Hermione tries not to*  
  
Hermione: Listen, here, you - you - you Muggle pop stars . . .? *Looks over at Ron*  
  
Ron: Almost. What are they doing?  
  
Hermione: They're - they're telling . . . embarrassing secrets?  
  
Ron: *buzzes* Yes!  
  
*Hermione walks cautiously over to Harry, who is once again frantically dancing*  
  
Hermione: Do you need any help, you . . . frustrated Irish dancer, you?  
  
Ron: Specifics. We need a specific dancer.  
  
Hermione: Oh, well, of course you do! And I'm supposed to know them by heart right?  
  
*Ron buzzes, the audience cheers, and Hermione and Harry walk back to their seats*  
  
Hermione: Thanks for buzzing, Ron!  
  
Ron: Anytime, baby! Uhh, Harry was the famous Irish step dancer Michael Flatley trying to get his dancer in line for opening night.  
  
Hermione: Oh, of course!  
  
Ron *laughs* Yeah . . . Uhhh, all right, our next game is a really fun game . . .  
  
A/N: There's the chapter!! 'Kay, you guys I need different types of music and/or different musical artists. Lemme know in your review (wink, wink, nudge, nudge!!!), an email (BGer_Girl731@yahoo.com), or an IM (DanceLuvr723)!!!!!! Thankies!!!!!!  
  
Two more chapters left in Episode 1!!!!!!!!!! 


	9. Greatest Hits

Chapter 9: Greatest Hits  
  
Thankies!!!!!  
  
To hieiandkuramalover: Thanks so much for your suggestions!!! I'm so glad you enjoyed the chapter!!!!! Hope you like this one too!  
  
To Clarinet-Chick-'06: Thanks so much for your suggestions!!! I'm so glad you like the story so far. I love Film Noir Scene!!! One of the best games between Ryan and Colin!!!  
  
To dragon emperess: Enjoy the chapter!!!!!!  
  
To alecatq: Props and Questions Only. Got it. Still trying to figure out what to use for Props. Anyway, enjoy the chapter!!!!  
  
To Lenai Riddle: WINK, WINK, NUDGE, NUDGE!!!!!!! Hahaha lol! Sorry, my friends recently yelled at me for using that too much . . . Oh, well. Yeah, Lee was Britney Spears. I really can't stand that woman. Sorry if anyone reading this likes her, by the way! Enjoy the chapter!!!  
  
To Gun Mage: Holy crap, your review scared me!!!!! Lol. Thanks for it anyway!!! Enjoy!  
  
To BaYer04rulz: AHHHH!!! Oh, my gosh, I'm so sorry!!!! *huggles* I'm an ass, though, anyone that knows me can tell you that . . . Enjoy the chapter!!!!!!  
  
To mystic-angel5: Ooooh, big, long review!!!! Whoooo!!!! Lol. *grins* Thanks so much for your suggestions and enjoy the chapter!!!!!  
  
To Moonie2: Thanks so much for your suggestions!! Hope you enjoy this chapter!!!!!!  
  
Another A/N: This chapter is dedicated to alecatq for requesting the game and to Moonie2, mystic-angel5, hieiandkuramalover, and Clarinet-Chick-'06 for their suggestions!!!!!  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Ron: All right, our next game is a really fun game. It's called Greatest Hits! Greatest Hits, with the help of Neville Longbottom on the piano and Angelina Johnson on guitar! It's for Lee, Hermione, and Harry. Come on down!  
  
*Lee, Hermione, and Harry jump up and walk down to the stage, Lee and Hermione grabbing stools along the way*  
  
Ron: Now, in this game, Lee and Hermione are playing the part of TV commercial pitchmen trying to sell a compilation album and Harry is going to sing the titles of songs they make up on the spot. Now what we need is a profession. What did you want to be when you were growing up?  
  
Alecatq: Teacher!  
  
Mystic-angel5: Evil genius!  
  
Ron: Teacher! That sounds good. All right, Lee and Hermione, whenever you're ready, Songs of the Teacher.  
  
Lee: We'll be right back to the scheduled program, One Hundred Best Whose Line Is It Anyway? Episodes, in just a few minutes. But first, have we got a deal for you!  
  
Hermione: That's right, Lee. Fifty-eight thousand and three songs on five CDs - *the audience laughs* they're all really short - all about the helpful profession of the teacher.  
  
Lee: Now, on these CDs, some of my favorite artists have contributed songs. One particular group, I just love. Good Charlotte.  
  
Hermione: *gasps* Oh, me, too!  
  
Lee: *aggressively* I love them more!  
  
*Audience laughs as Lee looks as though he's going to bite Hermione's head off*  
  
Hermione: Yeah, okay, sure! And we have a song of theirs on this collection. It's that great teacher-related song . . . "You Better Pay Attention!"  
  
*Audience laughs as Harry looks at Hermione and shakes his head. The tune to "Lifestyles on the Rich and the Famous" begins to play"*  
  
Harry: *pretends to be playing a guitar* Always sittin' behind my desk, or teachin' in front of the board, I see kids that aren't payin' attention. All they do is roll their eyes, and start unzippin' their flies *audience laughs* goin' on about how borin' I can be. I'd like to see them spend a week, with detention on the street. I don't think they would survive. If they could spend a school day or two, walkin' in my high heel shoes, I think they'd trip and they would fall. And then I'd laugh. Laugh.........  
  
Harry: *starts jumping around pretending to play a guitar* I think they'd better pay a lot of attention! They'll never start learnin'. Never start learnin'! If they don't start learnin' right now, they could end up in jail now. Then I'd start to laugh now!  
  
*Music ends and Harry pretends to throw down his pretend guitar. The audience laughs and claps*  
  
*Hermione grins and tries not to laugh*  
  
Lee: Oh, aren't they great?  
  
Hermione: You know, one group that was so, so, so, so popular a few years ago is also the group that wrote and sang one of my favorite songs. "Barbie Girl" by Aqua.  
  
Lee: *gasps and claps his hands together* Oh, I do love that song.  
  
Hermione: Did you know, the doll company that made Barbies, Mattel, sued Aqua for using Barbie in their song?  
  
Lee: *shifts on stool and looks at Hermione with actual interest* Really?  
  
Hermione: Yeah!  
  
Lee: Why??  
  
Hermione: The company claimed copyright infringement and defamation. They said the song sullied "Barbie's iconic image" with sexual innuendos.  
  
Lee: Wow, I didn't know that.  
  
*Audience laughs*  
  
Lee: Anyway, Aqua donated their great teacher-related hit . . . A Student Is Hitting On Me!  
  
*Harry stares at Lee before starting to move jerkily as "Barbie Girl" begins to play*  
  
Harry: *starts to sing in a high voice as Ron begins to laugh hysterically* I'm a blonde teacher girl in a bad-paying world. Little monsters! *voice switches from high to deep* Then one day, I saw him stick a note on my desk. It said, 'Hey, are you free Saturday night?' *high voice* I said 'no', he said 'please, I'll work hard on my math test.' Ooh-oh!  
  
*Harry begins to dance and Lee and Hermione are having hard time not laughing. Ron and Seamus have completely lost control, as has the audience*  
  
Harry: *high voice* I'm a teacher girl, in a teaching world. Students flirting. God, it's hurting! He won't accept a no, instead, calls me a ho'. *The audience, Ron, and Seamus laugh harder and Lee and Hermione lose it* All this flirtation . . . *hesitates but finally gives up* La la la la la laaa!!! *He strikes a pose as the music ends and the audience, Ron, Seamus, Hermione, and Lee continue laughing*  
  
Lee: Now, Hermione, what would you pay for a great CD set like this?  
  
Hermione: Oh, I don't know. Seventy-five ninety-five, if I have to guess.  
  
*Lee looks confused and leans in to Hermione*  
  
Lee: *talking quietly but still loud enough for the audience to hear* What are you doing? We're selling it for twenty-five ninety-five, not seventy- five.  
  
Hermione: I know, but my landlord just upped the rent.  
  
Lee: Oh, okay. *Begins talking in a normal voice* That's right, Hermione. Seventy-five ninety-five. *Audience laughs*  
  
Hermione: That's right. Anyway, another fantastic musical artist (A/N: Hermione's words, not mine!!) that has contributed for this compilation is that *cough* fake *cough* busty blonde, Britney Spears. *Audience laughs*  
  
Lee: That's right. Her great teacher hit . . . Can't Stand The Kids.  
  
*Harry hangs his head as the tune to "Me Against the Music" begins to play. Harry begins to dance like Britney*  
  
Harry: *singing in a sexy voice* The kids are there. Sittin' in their seats and bored as hell. Twirl their hair. See some guys with some pot and they're lookin' to sell. Don't even dare. Give ya weeks of detention before the bell. Why should I care? Only one not teachin' up in this hell. Hey, hey, hey!  
  
*The music ends, but Harry pretends not to notice and continues to mouth random words for a few more seconds as the audience laughs. Finally he notices the music stopped and he smiles at the audience and bows flamboyantly*  
  
Ron: *buzzes* All right, great job, you guys. *Audience claps and cheers as Lee, Hermione, and Harry head back to their seats* Lee, you looked like you were surprised up there when Hermione was going on about Aqua.  
  
Lee: I really didn't know Mattel sued them! When Hermione said that, that was a complete surprise!  
  
Ron: Guess you really do learn something new everyday. *Laughs* Uhh, a hundred points to Harry. Boy, I haven't seen you dance like that in public for a while.  
  
Harry: *laughs* Only in private for you, baby!  
  
Ron: Hahahaha. Okay, it's time to announce the winner of this episode!  
  
A/N: All right, now it's all up to you guys!!!!! I want the game, suggestions if the game needs it, and the winner!!!!! Let's hear what you think!!!!!! Chapter (and game) 10 doesn't get updated unless you do . . . . . . . . . . 


	10. Props and Surprise!

Chapter 10: Props and . . . Surprise!  
  
A/N: Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I've finally written a "Props" chapter. Hope everyone enjoys!  
  
THANKIES!!!!!  
  
To AngelEyes52: I wasn't really going for romance in this because there's none in the show. Sorry! But I'm so glad you like it!!!!!  
  
To Lenai Riddle: Ain't she a bitch?!?!?!? Lol. Hope this is soon enough for you!!!!!  
  
To Clarinet-Chick-'06: Yeah, I am doing another episode; that's what the author's note in the next chapter concerns, so please read!!!! (I'm begging for help!!!)  
  
To Sammy Solo: *squeals* Thanks sooooo much for your review! It made me all squishy-like inside . . . Enjoy!!!  
  
To wundergurl15: Isn't the real show awesome???? Enjoy the chap!!!  
  
To BaYer04rulz: Thanks so much for your suggestions, and hope you like the chapter!!!!  
  
To THE ENCHANTRESSES: Good to see I have new reviewers!!!! You guys are, like, all that keeps me going (which, in an odd sort of way, is kinda sad . . . oh well). Enjoy!!!  
  
To wettlewash: Thanks so much for your reviews and suggestion!!! PotC and LotR . . . *drool*. Oh, they're wonderful.  
  
To Crystal Raven: *screams* Omigosh, I love you!!!!!!!! You reviewed to EVERY DAMN CHAPTER!!!!!!! Thanks so much for everything, you're awesome!!!!!!  
  
To alecatq: Thanks so much for your review and suggestion!! I've been trying to figure out the name of that game you were talking about, but I can't figure it out and it's driving me MAD!!!!!! Arghhhh . . .  
  
To Fyeten: Thanks so much for your review!!!  
  
To mystic-angel5: Your review totally made my day. So nice . . . Thanks for all the reviews and laughs!!!  
  
To hieiandkuramalover: So . . . someone likes Lee!!! Lol. Thanks sooo much for your suggestions!!!!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Ron: Hey everybody. Let's give our winner a hand. Lee Jordan!  
  
*Audience claps and cheers as Lee gets up. He gestures his hands upward to show the audience to get louder. Then he spins around to face the audience and lowers his hand to make the audience stop cheering. Then he raises his hand and makes the audience cheer again. Then he lowers his hand and the crowed goes silent again. Then he points at someone and raises his hand slightly, and a small part of the audience cheers. Then he lowers his hand to make the group stop. Then he turns around to face Ron, nodding* [1]  
  
Ron: Sit down. *Audience laughs* Now, it's time for a great game I like to call . . . Props!  
  
*Audience cheers. Lee hands Harry and Seamus two orange foamy things shaped like spikes . . . or mountains . . . like this: /\/\/\. Then he gives Hermione and Ron two purple foamy hammers. Hermione looks incredulously at it for a moment before bopping Lee on the head with hers and going to her place*  
  
Ron: *looks at his hammer* Right, uhhh . . . whenever you're ready, Harry and Seamus, take it away.  
  
*Harry stands up his foamy (so it shall be called) so it's sticking up as Seamus tosses his behind him*  
  
Harry: *stands with his hands folded* It is with great sorrow we bury Muggle pop star Madonna after a freak boob job accident.  
  
*Hermione and Ron get down on their knees and place their hammers over their shoulders*  
  
Hermione and Ron: *marching on their knees and singing in a high voice* Hi ho, hi ho, it's off to work we go!  
  
*Seamus holds his foamy on the back of his head as Harry tries not to laugh*  
  
Seamus: *in a skater guy kind of voice* Dude, I swear, I totally nailed that 360!  
  
*Hermione's holding the hammer and pretending to pound something*  
  
Ron: She's a welder by day and *takes the hammer and throws it behind him. Hermione looks at him* a dancer by night!  
  
*Hermione starts laughing*  
  
*Harry has his foamy on his back and pretends to be a dinosaur, complete with the roars and everything*  
  
Seamus: *runs in the other direction* Jurassic Park 4: Another Crappy Sequel! [2]  
  
*Hermione pretends to hold reins connected to Ron and starts to hit him with the foamy*  
  
Hermione: *hitting Ron hard* On Dasher, on Dancer, on Prancer and Vixen! On -  
  
*Lee buzzes her and she looks over at him*  
  
Hermione: I'm not done. *continues hitting Ron* On Comet, on Cupid, on Donner and Blitzen!! Let's go, you stupid [bleep]!!!  
  
*Lee and the audience are laughing hysterically as Hermione walks over to the desk and hits the buzzer*  
  
Hermione: Now, I'm done. *hits Lee again with her hammer*  
  
*The other four actors laugh. Lee hits the buzzer repeatedly and they bring their props back over to him*  
  
Ron: That was great! Now, we've got a very special game for all of you, with a very special guest. Three-Headed Broadway Star! For Harry, Hermione, and me, helped out by Angelina Johnson on the keyboard. Seamus, go sit down.  
  
*Ron pushes Seamus back to his seat. Seamus turns around and looks as though he's going to cry*  
  
Audience: Awwww.  
  
*Ron looks ashamed. He walks over to Seamus and gives him a little hug. The audience starts laughing and cheering*  
  
Lee: Anyway, how this game goes is we're gonna pretend to be a strange three-headed Broadway star, and what happens, they have to make up a Broadway song, one word at a time, and what we need from the audience is the name of an unlikely Broadway musical. What is that Broadway musical?  
  
Audience member 1: My Hair and Yours!  
  
Audience member 2: At the Salon!  
  
Lee: Uhh, My Hair and Yours sounds good. Now, finish this statement: You've Got Beautiful Blank.  
  
Audience member 1: Hair Dye!  
  
Audience member 2: Hair Gel!  
  
Lee: Hair Gel. That sounds good. Ron, bring out our special guest!  
  
Ron: Ladies and gentlemen, our very special semi-not-really-celebrity guest . . . Draco Malfoy!  
  
*Draco (A/N: Gonna be fair and call him by his first name) struts out waving to the audience. He walks over to Lee and shakes his hands before doing the same to Harry, Ron, and Hermione. He then turns and sits down on the stool in front of Harry*  
  
Harry: *looks at his friends* He's being civil!  
  
Draco: I'm being paid.  
  
Lee: Okay, shut it, you two. So, Ron, Harry, and Hermione, you're singing to Draco as a strange, three-headed Broadway star, singing the hit love song, "You've Got Beautiful Hair Gel" from the Broadway musical, My Hair and Yours.  
  
*A love ballad begins playing*  
  
Ron: You've  
  
Harry: Got  
  
Hermione: Beautiful  
  
Ron: Hair gel  
  
*He laughs*  
  
Harry: Gel *gives Ron a pointed look*  
  
Hermione: It  
  
Ron: Makes  
  
Harry: Me  
  
Hermione: Want  
  
Ron: To  
  
Harry: *hesitates* Dance  
  
*Audience starts to laugh and Draco turns and looks at him. Harry shrugs*  
  
Hermione: My  
  
Ron: Hair ge- *mouthes an expletive*  
  
Harry: Gel!  
  
Hermione: Isn't  
  
Ron: As  
  
Harry: Pretty  
  
Hermione: As  
  
Ron: Your  
  
Harry: Gel  
  
Hermione: Is  
  
Ron: And  
  
Harry: So  
  
Hermione: I'm  
  
Ron: Going  
  
Harry: To  
  
Hermione: Steal  
  
Ron: It  
  
*The audience, Lee, and Seamus start to laugh*  
  
Harry: Yeahhh . . . [3]  
  
Hermione: My!  
  
Ron: Hair --  
  
Harry: *claps a hand over Ron's mouth as he sings* Gel!  
  
Hermione: Is!  
  
Ron: *laughing* Nothing  
  
Harry: Next!  
  
Hermione: To  
  
Ron: Yours!  
  
Harry: It  
  
Hermione: Has  
  
Ron: A  
  
Harry: Pretty  
  
Hermione: Sheen  
  
*Everyone looks at her*  
  
Ron: Where  
  
Harry: Can  
  
Hermione: I  
  
Ron: Get  
  
Harry: Some  
  
Hermione: Hair  
  
Ron: Gel  
  
Harry: That  
  
Hermione: Is  
  
Ron: Just  
  
Harry: Like  
  
Hermione: Yours?  
  
Ron: *thinks hard* Hey!  
  
Harry: *laughing* Ho!  
  
Hermione: I'm  
  
Ron: In  
  
Harry: Love  
  
Hermione: Not  
  
Ron: With  
  
Harry: You  
  
Hermione: And  
  
Ron: Not  
  
Harry: With  
  
Hermione: My  
  
Ron: *hesitates and starts laughing* Dog  
  
Harry: *laughing* But  
  
Hermione: *laughing* I'm  
  
Ron: In  
  
Harry: Love  
  
Hermione: With  
  
Ron: Your  
  
All three: *harmonizing* Hair gel!  
  
*Lee's laughing and presses the buzzer a few times. Harry, Ron, and Hermione start to laugh and shake hands with Draco. He gets up and goes over to shake Lee's hand. Harry picks up his stool and brings it offstage. Draco struts back out of the studio waving to the audience*  
  
Ron: *sitting down at his desk* That game's always so much fun.  
  
Harry: Yeah. Except for those idiots that can't seem to grasp the concept of 'one word at a time.'  
  
*He looks directly at Ron*  
  
Ron: Yeah, don't you just hate those people? *Audience laughs* Anyway, this was a great episode. We had tons of fun and thanks for joining us! Don't forget to stay tuned for a short . . . sort of . . . message from our sponsor. (A/N: A.K.A. me! Read it; it concerns the next episode!) Thanks again and goodnight!  
  
[1]: Yes, I stole this directly from Jeff Davis, one of the times he was winner. He's just so darn funny!!!  
  
[2]: No offense meant here to anyone that actually like Jurassic Park. I've never actually seen it. I had already thought up the props and just needed a third thing for Harry and Seamus. I was flipping through the channels on TV one day and Jurassic Park was on. If anyone thought I was making fun of Jurassic Park . . . well, I kind of was. Sorry.  
  
[3]: This is a sort of inside joke between my friends Becky, Ely, Erin, and Allie. Love you guys!!!!!  
  
A/N: Like I said above, the little note in the next chapter concerns the next episode (a sequel! . . . sort of) with which I need everyone's help. Thanks! 


	11. A Special Note from the Author

Chapter 11: A Special Note from the Author  
  
Okay, everyone. That was it. The end of "Whose Line Is It Anyway? Harry Potter Style! Episode one."  
  
I am so happy to have had this experience and am thrilled to announce that the next episode's games are completely and totally up to you guys! Everything the audience would normally participate in is your job now. I am going to sit back and act like Drew Carey (in Wayne Brady's words): "Do absolutely nothing'!" (Just kidding!)  
  
All right, people. My time with this story is finished. If you have any suggestions, requests or ideas, either review to this chapter or feel free to email me at whyistherumgone731@yahoo.com (Pirates of the Caribbean obsessed . . . I need major help . . .) or give me an IM at Dance Luvr723.  
  
Thank you for everything, all my readers, reviewers and friends!!!!!  
  
With much love,  
  
Katie  
  
P.S. SHAMELESS ADVERTISING!!!  
  
If you guys love me, please check out my other fics. My Pirates of the Caribbean fic is doing okay, but I would love you guys if you could check it out. My Harry Potter fic (Year 6) hasn't been doing so well since I took a break from Lent last year to June or July. I think all my old reviewers died . . .  
  
Thank you again!!! . . . Wait, hold on, I have to let some friends say a few things . . .  
  
Hermione: Everyone, thanks so much for tuning in to every game! We're all so glad you enjoyed the first episode and we really hope you continue to hang with us and our other friends in future episodes!  
  
Harry: Hey, we're really happy you stayed with us through the whole show! We worked hard to make all of you guys laugh!  
  
Seamus: Even if it was at our expense and humiliation, we're glad you liked everything!  
  
Lee: You guys have been absolutely fantastic! Do Katie and Ronniekins a favour and keep the great suggestions coming!  
  
Ron: I agree with Lee; you guys have been great and really helpful! Until next time . . .  
  
Hermione, Lee, Seamus, Ron, Harry, and Katie: Thanks so much for tuning in to Whose Line Is It Anyway? Harry Potter Style! Episode 1!  
  
*All six turn and start to walk away*  
  
Hermione: I think we need to thing of a shorter title . . .  
  
Don't forget to review, email or IM with your suggestions! The next episode won't be posted unless you do!  
  
Love and beans,  
  
Katie  
  
Ten'oio ar' oio amin meluva lle ilya. 


End file.
